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In some ways social,
in some, not too much.
This ambiance is pleasant but there’s little room.
I want to run, hide, act like a defiant child.
There’s a little voice booming inside of me,
reminding me to keep it together.
There is nothing here to fear.
Easy.
Difficult.
So many promises, the premise of old friendships.
I toe the line.
I’m grateful to feel welcomed.
I feel like an alien most days.
Today was one of those when it all kinda felt like drowning.
Then I came home to a space that stopped feeling like home a while ago… and I just wanted to cry and not stop.
Then I scrawled a new piece about all the stuff that is sucking the joy away. But the funny thing – a voice woven through it… a defiant voice, like the voice of resistance.
To be honest, I’m not sure how defiant I feel. Vulnerable, but not defiant. Clearly, though, that little alien voice in me is not gonna let me go down quietly, no matter how long I cry for.
Awesome!!
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