I hope
I pray
I wish upon the vast expanse
I plead the fifth
I run through the flames
I hide, suffocating in the smoke of dismay.
There are days, I’m afraid,
I’m not really alive.
But Emma says, “I’m doing better than
I give myself credit for.”
I pray to Jesus, she’s right.
I see the doubt in their eyes,
while a tiny child,
with a brain, too much like mine,
provides ample trials.
We’re two of a kind.
I’m doing my best, beating
the worn instruments of their tongues to silence.
Sometimes, this all makes no sense,
facing chemicals,moods that switch.
I’m awake and hardly ever tired.
But, my body feels as if I’ve run miles.
I’m present but I’m not.
I can’t stop.
I won’t stop.
I crave the art.
I crave the fire.
But I’m forced to stop,
mending all the burns,
when the fire comes to a stop.
I’m ambivalent,
won’t ask for
but need a helping hand.
What does it mean?
Why is it me who I’m fighting?
I normally never rhyme, but this time, I’m
left a victim to a rhythm
a stranger inside me has written,
and swimming in a chasm,
with a faceless phantom.
At least, for now, there’s a name.
Perhaps, a familar face will come later.
Over and over,
a familiar pendulum swings.
I can’t decipher a meaning
or the possibilities it could bring.
There’s a sun shining,
greeting me as I open my eyes.
I’m so grateful I could bask in today.
Open and ready,
I’m spinning on an edge.
I want to come down, now.
But if I do,
I’m terrified, I won’t remember who I AM.
12 responses to “What is This? This is Healing, Darling.”
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It’s true!!!! I got a cold Saturday, and I’m fighting it off . I got an equal amount of Christmas shopping and rest/family time over our Thanksgiving break. I feel refreshed and it’s nice. I’m still sick but definitely better than yesterday. I drank hot/warm tea all day at work, too. That has been really helping. I underestimated how much that helps. This has nothing to do with the poem but it’s funny I wrote about mental healing and I’m physically healing lol 😆 . Your comment is so thoughtful and I appreciate the time you took to write such a nice comment. Are you almost ready for the holidays?
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Sorry to hear that you aren’t feeling well. Hopefully the worst is behind you. Glad to hear you enjoyed Thanksgiving with your family and managed to get some rest and do some shopping for the holidays as well. I’m nearly done my Christmas shopping too. We got our tree last week and all my decorations are up. We’ve even gotten a bit of snow so it’s feeling and looking a bit like Christmas!! I love this time of the year!! Hopefully you’re all ready for the holidays as well!
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Yes! I’m starting to feel better, thank God. I’ve been drinking a lot of hot tea with honey at home and at work. I’ve also been sleeping a lot too once I’m home and done with dinner and other chores, saving my exercise for when I’m better as I get a lot of exercise with my kiddos at work. These kiddos are so sweet though, trying to give me hugs to make me feel better. I’m like “guys, I appreciate the love but stay clear of me ” lol I am hoping for more snow . I love ❄️ snow. You’re right, it does make it feel more like Christmas when it shows 😏
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They’re really intuitive kids. I was having a rough day the one day and the one little boy asked me, “What’s wrong, Miss Brittny?” I just told him I was tired thanked him for asking and being kind. It’s amazing to me how they know, though. Yes, sleep and water are the best healers. They really are
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